But this post isn't about Christmas movies or Arnold or turbo-man - it's about promises. Actually it's more about expectations. Actually it's more just me venting about things not happening.
I was clearly not meant for the "limelight," as evidenced by recent events. Or as evidenced by my entire life history. For example, back in April, my friend Britt and I went to Salt Lake for General Conference. Every time I go, I try to strategically place myself in front of the people with cameras, hoping to "accidentally" make it into the Ensign. It never works. However, this year THEY approached ME. I posed in front of some beautiful snow covered bushes behind the temple as they shot some photos and had me sign a piece of paper waiving my life away. I was pretty excited and have been anxiously awaiting this month's edition of the Ensign... until today. Needless to say, I am NOT in the Ensign. Whatever. I'm sure they had a perfectly good reason for not using my picture. They probably already had too many redheads in there... ha. NOT.
Lest you think I am being dramatic, here is example #2. I was slightly bummed about not being in the church magazine, but I thought to myself "hey don't worry- you'll be in the newspaper tomorrow, remember??!!" Yesterday, while walking on campus, I was stopped by a Daily Universe reporter and asked tons of questions about my "feelings and insights" on the death of Osama bin Laden. I mean, I'm no expert, but I am a political science major and I did watch the news for like an hour on Sunday night, so I felt like I had something semi-worthwhile to say... Open up today's newspaper and BAM. Nothing. Both articles about bin Laden quote all of the current Washington Seminar students. Thanks a lot Obama- waiting until I leave DC to catch Osama. Perfect.
And those are just the most recent occurances. There was the time that I was asked to be a bookstore model and I had to go have a million pictures taken of me in some hideous BYU t-shirt while I did awkward things like "jumping into rain puddles" and "blowing air kisses" and holding a fake umbrella. Do you know how hard it is to hold a fake umbrella and "jump" into a make-believe puddle while still smiling for a camera? Obviously my discomfort and pain showed in the photo shoot because after TWO years of waiting to see my picture in the BYU bookstore advertisements, I have realized that this is just another dream of mine that has been crushed.
There was the hair model incident (some salon-owner asked me to be their model for the advertisements/sign for their salon. Got my #, made an appointment, gave me a haircut, promised me a free one, and then never called), the failed C-SPAN coverage (one time, while interning in Congress, I decided it would be fun to be on TV. My coworker and I ran over to where they were filming Mitch McConnell and Harry Reid and stood right behind them. Just as the camera turned and they started to film me, my coworker stepped right in front of me. Thanks bud), and the fake MTV appearance (my high school principal took all of the seniors up to NYC to be on MTV's TRL with Avril Lavigne. My mom was so excited to see me on tv and even taped the episode. I was pretty excited too... until we watched it and realized that I had faced the wrong way the whole time. All you see are a few pathetic shots of the back of my head).
There you have it. A lifetime of failed attempts to be famous. So next time you think you see me on tv, don't get your hopes up. It's probably not me.
And in an effort to make myself feel better, here is our group shot from DC. I just love it.
I also somehow find a twisted sort of pride in the fact that President Samuelson is the focal point of the picture but somehow I managed to weasel my way to the center. HA.
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